Elderly couple accidentally burns house during s3x game

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A couple’s sexual game turned horribly wrong as they accidentally burned their house to the ground with a 75-year old flamethrower.

Firefighters were called on the site after receiving an unusual phone call but could do nothing to save the 45-year old house from being a total loss.

Nancy Brown, the 911 operator who answered the call from 96-year old Maurice Fogerty, says she first thought she was dealing with pranksters when he told her he had “torched the house with napalm while having sex with his wife”.

“He told me he was penetrating his wife with his M1, as usual, but got too excited and activated the flamethrower.”

Ms. Brown says the explanation shocked her for a moment, and it took her almost a minute to realize it was actually true.

He kept repeating that everything was burning and I could hear his wife screaming behind him, but I still couldn’t believe this could be real.”

Mr. Fogerty and his wife were transported to the hospital to be treated for the psychological shock caused by the event but are otherwise uninjured.

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They shouldn’t face any criminal charges. but may have problems when it comes to claiming their insurance policies, as damage caused by the use of weapons during sex games is rarely covered.

A case involving a Gatling gun in 2004 and another involving a rocket launcher in 2011 have made their way to court, and in both cases the insurance company didn’t have to pay anything to the claimants.

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